Review: The Teratic Tome - A Book of Horrors

(This review is also posted at RPG.net.)

Rafael Chandler hooked me up with a copy of his new monster book, the Teratic Tome (TT) and asked me to take a gander. In short: it’s excellent.

You can pick it up the PDF at DriveThruRPG/RPGNow for $6.66 (nice price) or as hardback at Lulu for $20.99. I have the PDF, but the hardback looks fantastic (more about that below).

Listed as an “OSRIC-compatible bestiary,” it is useable with any old-school D&D edit or D&D variant.

TT appears to be part of a product line called Evolved Grottoes & Griffins. At least I hope it’s going to turn into a product line, because TT is great.

There are several things that set this book apart from the sea of monster books out there.

The Cover

TT’s cover stands out. It screams old-school, but its voice sets it apart from the rest of the OSR choir. TT looks like it came out in the late 80s, during the time of the Monster Manual II, the Manual of the Planes, and the Unearthed Arcana. It reminds me of the Manual of the Planes’ astral juggernaut in particular.

The Tone

TT is horrific. This is a book full of monsters. These aren’t hit point bags meant to be mowed down by the party. These baddies will make your players say, “Ewww.” Its R-rated (at the least), but not in a cheap shock kind of way. These monsters are meant to disturb.

The interior artwork isn’t censored, so don’t leave this book out where kids can reach.

Here are a couple of examples:

The remnant “looks like a humanoid scuttling about on all fours, except that it has four arms and no legs. Stranger still, each of its four arms ends in a bloody stump.”

The nethasq is a humanoid female that “sports a glistening mass of foot-long tentacles that end in barbs and hooks” where its genitals should be. It “haunts places where women have been defiled” and “[w]hen a man enters a place that the monster has claimed for its own, he begins to seep blood from his mouth, anus, and urethra.”

Implied Setting

The monster entries hint at a setting or world or whatever you want to call it. This is like the original Monster Manual and Monster Manual II. Remember how the MM told you about how Orcus and Demogorgon hated each other? Well, in TT, you have the Demon Queen Abyzou plotting against Beleth, the Locust Perfect. Or, we learn that the agonists were “[c]reated in a rare moment of collaboration between High Devil Ahriman and the Demon Queen Abyzou” and that the “demons of Ghorom (216th layer of the Abyss) are chaotic evil monstrosities who feed on weakness and decency.”

The details are not distracting or over the top. They provide just enough to give the reader a sense of depth and motivation.

Monsters with Motivation

The monsters in the TT have motivations that are unique to say the least.

The altar beast, a “towering, wormlike entity with rubbery mauve skin that scrapes off as it undulates across the ground,” was created by a forgotten god of matrimony. What does that mean? That means it “preys upon those who dissolve sacred bonds of marriage. This can include spouses, clerics, priests, nobles, and anyone who participates in the annulment of marriage.”

As one can see, these are specific motivations. At first, I wasn’t sure what to make of it. Would I want a monster like that?

But, the more I read, the more adventure ideas came to me. Why are all these priests dying in the city? Because there is an altar beast on the loose. These details might inspire a whole adventure.

Someone on Google+ called TT “the missing monster book for Lamentations of the Flame Princess” and I’d say that is a damn good summary. A lot of the monsters seem like they would be terrorizing a village or secretly being worshiped by the villagers.

And one could still easily ignore these motivations and use the monster without if need be.

Personal Favorites

Here are some of my favorite aspects of the TT.

The Venerable Dragons: These ten dragons aren’t your old “it's red, it breathes fire; it's blue, it breathes lightning, etc.” Rather, these dragons are each one-of-a-kind and on the level of deities.

When Ke-Sectat Hatath the purple dragon awakens, the sun “burns reds.” He “soars into the city, accompanied by giant insects and flying vermin.” Then there is Makkas-Nephata, who is “preceded by unnatural rains,” such as blood, frogs, snake venom, and bile.

I can see making an epic adventure to stop the awakening on these dragons or working them into the background of a setting to explain why a region was laid to waste.

Owlbear Variants: TT includes the Kodiak hooter and tufted grizzly. It’s fun to seem new takes on old standards.

Various Oddities

There are a few things that are, well, just odd about TT. I dug them, but they’re worth pointing out.

Halflings are Crazy SOBs. The halfling culture alluded to in TT is just nutty evil. For example the Tenebrous Halflings created creatures known as “audiences.” “When several of the Tenebrous Halflings neared death, they would perform a necromantic ritual that transferred their souls into a monstrous body that had been stitched together by their chirurgeons. Within this new body, a floating sack of flesh adorned with tentacles, each audience was a collection of diverse personalities.”

Not sure there are too many “floating sacks of flesh” floating around your standard halfling shire.

I dig the different take, but your mileage may vary.

Lots of Tentacles. I like me some Cthulhu-esque monsters as much as the next guy, but, boy howdy, you are going to find a lot of tentacles in this book.

Lots of Tentacles Where Genitals Should Be. Self-explanatory.

Monsters Have Smells. When I took writing classes many moons ago, I was told that one of the most under-described senses was smell. This seems to have been taken to heart here, as just about every entry mentions how the monster smells. And this isn’t the same ol’ “smells like rotting death and/or feces” you usually get. For example, the infiltrator “is a pink-skinned humanoid with lavender tentacles and a red-lipped circular maw in its chest” that “smells of fresh-peeled orange rind.”

I like this touch, even if it came across as a bit forced at times.

Bonus Feature

TT includes its own treasure system which is simpler than most I’ve seen and, therefore (in my opinion) better. Coin treasure categories include categories like “cache (3d20 cp, 3d20 sp, 2d10 ep, d10 gp)” or “fortune (d100 ep, d100 gp, d20 pp).” Categories for jewels, gems, scrolls, potions, and magic items include categories like “few (d4-1)” or “several (2d10-2).”

Conclusion

If you want traditional humanoids, dragons, ogres, etc., you probably won’t care for TT.
If you’re looking for horror-inspired, demonic monstrosities to make your players gag, this is the book for you.

Resources for Converting D&D to Castles & Crusades

Convert or else!

I've noticed that people come across my blog a lot while searching for help for converting Dungeons & Dragons to Castles & Crusades. Here are a few great resources for converting D&D to C&C (whether it's Basic, 1e, 2e, 3e, or 3.5). I haven't seen much about converting 4e, unfortunately.

Duke Omote's Advanced Castles & Crusades Page - This page has all kind of rules expansions that incorporate rules from various D&D editions into C&C.  For example, Omote has rules for Skills and Talents (a.k.a. Feats) that might make converting PCs easier. If you are looking to convert older D&D to C&C, he has rules for Racial Classes and more.

The Crusader's Companion -  Peter J. Schroeder compiled a ton of great gamer-created C&C rules into this impressive tome and it is just awesome. It includes a lot of d20 SRD monsters, items, spells, etc. that aren't in the C&C core rules. Also, the Castle Keepering chapter has a Conversion section that provides tables and charts to help you convert D&D materials from other editions into C&C.

The Castle Keepers Guide - While it doesn't deal with conversion specifically, it does include rules for Skills and Advantages (aka Feats) that might make converting 3.0 or 3.5 D&D to C&C easier.

Duke Omote’s Castles & Crusades House Rules, Enhancements, and Conversions

Castles & Crusades Society member and FPQ Member (president? founder perhaps?), Duke Omote has created some kick ass house rules for Castles & Crusades, which he calls Advanced Castles & Crusades.  One of the great features of C&C is that it is very easy to house rule the  hell out of it.  Omote demonstrates this with style with these rules, giving his take on elements of other editions of D&D.  Want to add Feats ala D&D 3rd edition?  Try his Talents rules.  Like those Secondary Skills from 1st edition? Check out his rules for ‘em.

All of his stuff is great for supplementing your existing C&C game or perhaps easing the conversion from another version of D&D (e.g., 3.5 to C&C).

On his Rules Expansions page, he has rules for:

• Racial Classes ala Basic D&D
• Skills ala AD&D 2nd edition (err, sorry, “non-weapon proficiencies”) and D&D 3rd edition
• Secondary Skills ala AD&D
• Weapon Mastery ala Basic D&D
• Talents (a.k.a. Feats) ala D&D 3rd edition
• And, as they say, much, much more.

Many thanks, Omote, for all the hard work and thanks for sharing this with the gaming world.

Old School Harlotry

Topless Robot has a thorough breakdown of the infamous Harlot table from the 1st Edition Dungeon Master's Guide: link (NSFW language).

I wonder what the XP table for the Rich Panderer looks like?

Fantasy Forest Books and Their Great D&D Art

I took snapshots of some of the interior art from the Fantasy Forest books.  The picture quality isn't the best, but I tried.

Mario Macari, Jr.'s art from The Ring, the Sword, and the Unicorn

Michael Fishlel's art from Ruins of Rangar

Pamela Summertree's art from Dungeon of Darkness

Mario Macari, Jr.'s art from Star Rangers and the Spy 

(Star Frontiers!)

Fantasy Forest Books – Welcoming Kids to the Dungeon One Choice at a Time

In my box of adventure, I found four Fantasy Forest books:

#1 The Ring, the Sword, and the Unicorn by Jim “Gamma World” Ward

#2 Ruins of Rangar by Michael Carr

#5 Dungeon of Darkness by John Kendall

#6 Star Rangers and the Spy and the Spy by Jean Blashfield and Beverly Charette

So far, my wife and I have read #1 and #2 to Chaos, with #1 being her clear favorite. It’s pretty hard to beat a unicorn for little girl appeal. Although Ruins of Rangar has a pegasus on the cover, it more or less has a cameo appearance and Chaos wasn't too impressed.  I’m guessing the cover of Dungeons of Darkness is a bit too creepy for her and Star Rangers might be too sci-fi (she has never shown much interest in spaceships and such).


There has been much hullabaloo about WotC's new D&D for kids venture, Monster Slayers.  They have a free adventure, Heroes of Hesoid,  here: link and a Monster Slayers story book here: link.   Troll Lord Games is onto this as well with their Harvesters RPG (as well as the eternally delayed Castles & Crusades Basic).

I think this is great. Like the cigarette industry, we need to hook 'em while they're young!  Seriously, though, it is great to see people realizing there is a market for kid-friendly RPGs.  When I started this blog, I thought I was in a minority, but I've realized there are tons of gaming parents out there.  A lot of them, myself included, want a way to share our hobby with our kids.

I think WotC, and any other gaming company, would do well to revisit Choose Your Own Adventure-style books.  They really are a great gateway to the fun of role playing.  My daughter can't get enough of them.  What is really cool is that these books use the monsters and the artistic styles from the game.  The dragon art in The Ring, the Sword... is done in the same style as the 1st edition Monster Manual and stirges attack the the heroes in the Ruins of Rangar.  (I'll put up some pictures of the art in a bit.)

I keep thinking of this quote:
Fairy tales do not tell children that dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children that dragons can be killed. - G. K. Chesterton

My daughter is kind of a scaredy cat, much like I was at that age (hell, I would literally run out of the room when David Banner hulked out on the old "Incredible Hulk" TV show).  But these books have the kid as the hero (or at least as a brave side-kick).  In The Ring..., the kid is riding a unicorn and battling orcs and dragons.  In Ruins..., the kid is wielding a dagger and kicking skeletons to bits (notice how the hero is smart enough to not even attempt a piercing weapon. ha!).  This sort of crystallizes an un-hearlded benefit of gaming for kids.  Sure, there are monsters in it.  But the players' goal is to slay those monsters, overcome traps, and save the day.  More importantly, they have the means and powers to do so.

To this day, my wife is amazed that I, as a kid, didn't have nightmares about all those pictures in the Monster Manual.  Like I said, I was a chicken-shit.  So why didn't I?  Because the monsters were there to be slain.  That goblin only had 1 hit die and I knew my 3rd level fighter could bash its brains in with his morningstar.

These Fantasy Forest books are great way to show kids the fun of gaming.  The kid gets to be the hero and, really, who doesn't want that?

Child-sized AD&D Books

Mayhem and Chaos learn the Gygaxian ways.

My friend Rob gave me these neat tiny, 1st edition Advanced Dungeons and Dragons books for Christmas.  An Italian company called Twenty First Century Games put these out.  According to this site, the mini books were produced to celebrate the 25th anniversary of the game.  I find that kind of odd given that when D&D hit its 25th year mark, it was well into the 2nd Edition.  Why didn't they make miniature versions of the current edition? Also, if this is true, I'm also kind of surprised they didn't use the original 1st edition art, but opted for the Easley art used in the latter days of 1st edition.  Don't get me wrong, I love the Easley covers, but it just seems you'd go for the original art if you were celebrating the anniversary.



Regardless, they are very cool.   Yes, they do have the actual text inside, although you need a magnifying glass to read it, and a strong one at that.

Here is a size comparison:

(notice the old Toys R Us price tag on the large Monster Manual II.  Ah, remember when that store sold D&D?)

As you can see, Chaos approves.

All in all, I received:
- Players Handbook
- Dungeon Masters Guide
- Monster Manual
- Monster Manual II
- Unearthed Arcana

Favorite Trap

Inspired by a recent Penny Arcade strip here, I thought I'd post my favorite D&D trap.

It's from "A3: Assault on the Aerie of the Slave Lords."

Cunning Gelatinous Cubes
"As soon as the first rank of the party walks onto the 10 foot x 20 foot area (marked by the dotted lines) a 1-foot-thick slab of stone tilts, spilling them into a pit on top of a gelatinous cube. Characters in the second rank must save vs. Paralyzation to avoid falling into the pit. [Frost - Note: only the *second* rank gets to make a save.] Every round, a character who is in contact with the cube will take 2-8 points of damage and must save vs. Paralyzation or become paralyzed for 5-20 rounds. In addition, once per round the cube will extend a pseudopod and strike an opponent up to 15 feet away. The pit is 10 feet wide, 20 feet long, and 5 feet deep. The cube has altered its shape to fits this area."

To make matters worse, there is a second cube in the room that sneaks up on the party while they deal with the first. Glorious.

When I DMed that module back in high school, I do recall it messed up the party's monk pretty badly, but I don't think anyone died. I think it's the evil simplicity of it that appeals to me. Well, that and it involves gelatinous cubes (and cunning ones at that).

My Gaming Background

To say I have not been very prolific with this blog is the understatement of the year. Well, like the blog title states, I’m a dad and a busy one with two little girls, not to mention work, etc. I have resolved to get this thing up and running, though, so here it goes.

Let me explain a bit about myself. I have been playing Dungeons & Dragons since I was eight. My older brother taught me the rules back in the day and I’ve been in love with the game ever since. I cut my teeth on Advanced Dungeons & Dragons because it’s the rule set my brother was using at the time. I later found his basic set rules (with the Erol Otus covers) and I recall a friend having the red box, but I never made much use of those rules. To me, AD&D was D&D. I stuck with AD&D 1st edition for quite some time, stubbornly refusing to move to AD&D 2nd edition when it came out. I did later switch to AD&D 2e when I realized that the rules weren’t a hell of a lot different than 1e. Hell, THACO seemed like a damn revolution (although, funny enough, it actually first appeared in the 1st edition Dungeon Master Guide). My gaming group regularly used 1e and 2e materials interchangeably and I DMed tons of 1e modules. Ha, it was an interesting surprise to me, and my players I’m sure, when I started DMing “Against the Giants” without realizing giants had received some steroids between 1e and 2e.

I jumped into 3rd edition as soon as it came out. That version of D&D really got me excited about D&D again. I felt that it brought back much of the great flavor that had been ripped out of 2e in TSR’s rush for political correctness. We had our half-orcs and assassins back! One could even use the words “demon” and “devil” again! Gasp! I was a bit miffed when 3.5 came out because I felt deceived. The gaming community was told it was simply a patch to the old system, sort of like a cleaned up printing of the 3e rules. Well, that wasn’t the case. Yes, one could use 3e materials in a 3.5 game without much difficulty, but the same could be said of 1e materials in a 2e game. I just wish Wizards of the Coast had been upfront and called 3.5 what it really is: the 4th edition of the game.

As for the official 4th edition of D&D (which I see as the 5th edition, really), I have no interest in it. I could go on and on about it, but the simple fact is that it’s not the game for me. I actually wouldn’t mind trying it as a player, but I don’t have the time or desire to learn new rules, especially those that were declared incompatible with my older materials.

While I play D&D 3.5, my favorite system is Castles & Crusades by Troll Lord Games. It is a version of D&D best seen as a simple, rules-light version of D&D 3.5. I’ll explain why I love C&C in another post.

For whatever reason, I never have much interest in systems other than D&D (I see C&C as a version of D&D). I did play in a great Shadowrun campaign back in the day and I ran Gamma World from time to time, but D&D is my home system and I can’t really push myself to move beyond it. I’ll gladly play other RPGs (and would do so if I had more time), but I have no interest in GMing them (although I do have an itch to GM Gamma World again).

Well, that is enough for now. As you can see from the margins, I’m currently DMing a Rappan Athuk Reloaded campaign. I think I’ll detail that in my next post.